Assignment #15- Final Reflection

Looking back at my previous bloggs I have noticed a big change in my writting. I do feel as I have acomplished my goals for this semester however, I am well aware that I still have a long way to go. I have noticed alot of improvement in my writting. For starters I am more concise with my writting, I say more by writting less. I have also noticed that my grammar and especially my punctuation skills have improved greatly. I use to write many run-on sentences, now I pause in between with commas and complete my sentences with a period. Before I would have one long sentence with many ideas joined together with commas, slowly I am breaking away from that habit. I learned to improve my writting through peer review. I also learend about the rethorical situations found in writing such as audience, genre and stance. Lastly, in this class I learned to appeal to audience through ethos, pathos and logos.  This semester went by quickly but I feel as if I learned alot and I enjoyed it. 

Assignment #14- Planning for Revisions

I have chossen to revise my litteracy narrative, because it is the first essay I wrote for this class and I want to see how my English skills have improved over the semester.  The strengths of my essay are that I organized my essay with an intro, a body and a conclusion. I feel like the weaknesses in my literacy nerrative are my grammar as well as my thesis and I don't think I catch my readers attention.

To revise my essay I am going to try to tell the story in a different way. I am going to begin by brainstorming for new and different ideas. I am going to re-write my essay and then I am going to visit the writing center after meeting with the proffessor then I am going to do a one on one peer review.

I am hoping to find another way to tell the story in a more interesting way. I don't think I caught my readers attention. My story I felt was boring and didn't make my reader want to continue readding, as if  the reader was thinking so what? The only thing that I can do is appeal to my audience using humor or emotional appeal.

Assignment #13- Analyzing and Writing Arguments

I analyzed the essay Should The Obama Generation Drop Out.  The writer used a judgmental tone to argue that today's generation does not care about academics, are not top students and do not have the money to afford a four year university. The writer makes a strong argument and provides concrete evidence; however, he makes his audience question their intelligence this causes a great flaw in his essay. In making his audience question their own intelligence the writer ultimately fails to appeal to his audience-who would be wealthy educated people who have already obtained an education. The writer is ultimately making two arguments, his second argument is that employers should consider hiring people with certifications not just people with B.A degrees. This taught me that a trustworthy tone is important, my word choice is also important because it is the ultimate factor that plays into whether.

Thinking Critically About Evidence

Thesis: The federal government should not have the right to censor websites such as youtube.com or wikipedia.com. Censoring these websites would indicate that the federal government has the ability to exploit their power to benefit corporations instead of the majority of American citizens. Many Americans would consider the censorship of these websites to be oppressive.

• The strongest piece of evidence that I came across is a logical. In my thesis I argued that I the government would be exploiting their power by censoring websites such as Wikipedia.com or youtube.com to benefit industries, especially the music industry. This is my most compelling piece of evidence because the government is considering a law to censor these websites, not to regulate what the public watches but because musicians and record labels are losing money. In this essay I can logically appeal to the audience by arguing that the government looks out for industries instead of looking out for the people, because they are overlooking how people benefit from websites such as youtube ans wikipedia.

• The weakest piece of evidence that I could of brought about in my essay is the idea that if the government can pass a law the controls what citizens do online, what can't they pass a law about? There are many countries that  have passed a law that regulate what the public watches in line. This is a form of oppression to people because the government is dictating the way people live their lives. This is my weakest piece of evidence simply because I need more back up information to make my evidence credible.